Have you ever thought of self-love as a superpower? Neither had I… until I met Mariam. Now, I’m convinced we should be teaching all our children how to love themselves. Let me explain.
A remarkable reaffirming experience occurred as I was finishing the first draft of my book, Outside Eden’s Gate: The Secrets of Self-Empowerment. I had just reached the conclusion that self-love is the treasure to be found at the end of the journey of self-empowerment.
And then, I traveled to Kampala, Uganda. I had been contracted by the Alliance for Malaria Prevention to provide technical assistance to the country’s Ministry of Health; my assignment was to help develop a communication strategy that would encourage people to sleep under bed nets to protect family members from being bitten by malaria-carrying mosquitoes.
Quite remarkably, I noticed every time one of my Ugandan colleagues – Mariam — entered a meeting room at the Ministry, the spirits of the meeting participants would pick up. It was as if Mariam’s broad smile was an infection, which, unlike malaria, needed to be transmitted to others.
One day, I felt confident enough to pull Mariam aside in the corridor to point out the impact she was having on others. I mentioned how infectious her smile was. I asked her to explain to me her constant positive disposition and her radiant smile. Without skipping a beat, Mariam replied, “My father taught me to love myself.”
Mariam’s statement was an epiphany for me. I had never heard before of a parent telling a child to love his or herself. What a different world this would be if we taught our children that they are worthy of their own love!
Mariam’s revelation also confirmed for me I was on the right track when I had written that…
. . . sensing self-worth, knowing I am enough, and feeling an innate lovability are indispensable for achieving personal empowerment. The secret is to embrace your inner beauty and let it radiate out to the world like an infectious substance. Realizing your inner beauty will help others.
But wait, there is still more! More recently, I had the good fortune to host Mariam as she passed through Washington, D.C. Remarkably, almost everywhere we went, strangers commented to her on how pretty and good looking she was. As we passed an encampment of homeless people near the White House, a homeless man shouted out “What a good looker!” At the airport, I heard the woman checking her baggage tell Mariam how pretty she is; and on and on.
Self-empowerment is ultimately self-love. Self-love is a superpower, indeed. Imagine if we all embraced our inner beauty, if we taught our children how lovable they are. After all, we are all beautiful and brilliant. Imagine how we could transform the world by radiating out this love.
Insecurity and low sense of self-worth project greed, dominance and hatred into the world. True self-empowerment based in love of oneself projects loving kindness into our world. I wish that each one of us appreciated our self-worth and inner beauty. Spread the word. Give meaning to the lessons from Mariam. And, as parents, let’s figure out how to teach self-love to our children. Stay tuned as we explore this dimension in future blogs.